List od zarzadu pewnej miedzynarodowej instytucji do
To: All Polish Speaking Staff
Subject: Improper Language Usage
It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our office in Poland that offensive language is commonly used by our polish speaking staff. Such behavior, in
addition to violating our policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive
to both visitors and staff. All personnel will immediately adhere to the following rules:
1.. Words like "jebal to pies", "kurewskie zycie", "chuj" and
other such expressions will not be tolerated or used for emphasis or dramatic effect, no matter how heated a discussion may become.
2.. You will not say "jebac" when someone makes a mistake, or
"pocalujcie mnie w dupe" if you see someone being
reprehended, or gówno when a major mistake has been made. All forms and derivations of the verb "srac" and "jebac" are utterly
inappropriate and unacceptable in our environment.
3.. No project manager, section head or administrator
under any circumstances will be referred to as "chujek", "chuj", "zajebaniec" or "debil".
4.. Lack of determination will not be referred to as "srac" nor will persons who lack initiative be referred to as "chuj".
5.. Unusual or creative ideas offered by management are not to be referred to as "pierdoly".
6.. Do not say "idz sie jebac" if somebody is persistent; do not add "pojeb", if a colleague is going through a difficul situation. Furthermore, you must not say "zjebalismy" to (refer to item
2) nor "Wyjebiemy sie na tym" when a matter becomes excessively complicated.
7.. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say "pocaluj mnie w dupe" nor should you ever substitute "May I help you?" with "Czego kurwa chcesz!?".
8.. Under no circumstances should you ever call your elderly industrial partners "kurewski dostawca".
9.. Do not say "idzcie do pizdy z tym chujem" when a relevant
project is presented to you, nor should you ever answer "metrowy chuj ci w dupe" when your assistance is required.
10.. You should never call partner representatives as "zajebana swinia" or "kurewski debil".
11.. The sexual behavior of our staff is not to be discussed in terms such as "pizda jebana", "kurewskie bydle" or "chujowy pedal".
12.. Last but not least, after reading this note, please do not say "moga sobie tym podetrzec tylek!" Just keep it clean and dispose of it properly. Thank you.
Dziewczynka, która nie potrafiła odróżnić własnej babci od wilka... musiała być albo skrajnie głupia albo pochodzić z bardzo brzydkiej rodziny.