@fulmar Tak btw. warto mieć zdrowe "fuck your drama" podejście w tym rodzaju:
"As an INTJ, I often give responses to questions, or suggestions to implement a strategy, or advice, or general input that the person, or group, will just shrug off as senseless babble. It's not.
I have been sitting back silently, watching the situation slowly build. I have passively made my best attempts to encourage a beneficial outcome without getting hopelessly trapped neck deep in the drama of it all.
All of that outward image and stereotypical nonsense of being aloof, detached, and emotionally unavailable? Nothing could be further from the truth. I am far too sensitive. I care way too much. And, from a standpoint of cognitive functions, because I am poorly equipped to rationally deal with such things, all of that gets so lost in translation when interacting with the other personality types who prioritize focusing on the present moment, with no respect for the past -- and no regard for future consequence.
In serious situations, my mindset is fully into resolving the problem and taking full advantage of the available resources to promote the best possible outcome. I have done all the mental processing to weigh the pros and cons of every variable or contingency I could conjure in my mind. I have exhausted myself in efforts to disregard the meaningless fluff, and attain all the pertinent information necessary to hone in on the path towards the best possible outcome. Did I overlook something? Enlighten me.
Some people just like being stuck. They make poor decisions that create the drama that fuels their own sense of purpose and identity. They have no interest in solutions. Attention is all that matters. Spare me the invitation to the pity party. You won't like the gift I offer.
And, that is what feeds the INTJ stereotypes. There is no future in caring for people who lack the ability and motivation to care for themselves. Why should I invest myself in anybody who can't respect my desire to help the individual, or group, get from where they are to where they someday aspire to be?
Don't mind me, I will be sitting at the peak of the mountain waiting for everybody else to figure out what they want, and how to get there. No, don't call me selfish. No, don't be resentful. No, don't say I am cold, aloof, condesending, and emotionally detached. No, don't say I am an elitist. Save that narcissism rant for somebody else. Pin the mental illness tags on some other donkey.
I tried to shine a flashlight on the path. I tried to explain my position. I said exactly what I was going to do and why I was going to do it. And, while everybody else was procrastinating, evaluating options, and drowning in drama.. I physically and emotionally walked away.. to actually accomplish something.
The general population simply can not fathom how the healthy and mature INTJ brain operates.
Trapped within their minds, INTJs have a library of past events and circumstances to draw from. They are well equipped to draw hints from whatever is being offered in the present moment.. but, their true sense of worth and purpose is entirely invested in making the most of what resources are available and creating a beneficial future from that pool of information.
At face value, to observe me, you would see a guy at work who is almost entirely self trained, and extremely independent. You would see a guy who avoids all politics and drama and pretentiousness. You would see a guy who openly scoffs at people who think they know everything based solely on the title of their position. Because of my conscious effort to steer clear of all those hurdles and distractions, you would also see a person who sets the standards of performance and production that many of my professional peers dismiss as dumb luck, or claim that I am somehow cheating the numbers, or manipulating things to my own advantage at their expense.
While they are busy trying to make friends and sell excuses.. I am applying knowledge, taking hints from real time, forming a plan of action, and climbing a mountain.
At face value, if you can't motivate me to better myself, and we can't work together to accomplish a tangible objective, I will not waste my time with the distraction.
That alone is 95% of why communicating with an INTJ about something important often seems about as frustrating as speaking in a native tongue to somebody who only knows a foreign language.
To find common ground, focus on the potential solutions.. not the overwhelming dysfunction of whatever the problem or issue happens to be. That is the only language an INTJ knows. If you can't reach them at their level, the impenetrable wall raises and they will invest themselves elsewhere. And, yes.. that bothers this INTJ. But, you would never know. Being a person who has no problem with differentiation perception from reality, I make a conscious effort not to burden myself with such distractions. Time is not a renewable resource.. and, stagnation is such a waste of potential.
Seems like a rather cold and dismissive response, right? Now look at it from the perspective of the end result.
Wow.. see how I can say I apparently care too much? If I didnt care at all, humanity would not be so frustrating and, oftenly, disappointing.
And that is what many fail to realize about INTJs. They do care. They are sensitive. They do want to solve the problems that hold society back. They do want to have people in their lives. But, damn.. Why do so many people love ignoring stable ground to instead dive head first into oceans of quicksand?
I happen to have many chapters of that approach stored in my own past. No thanks. I know where that route leads. I did the mental math and found a better path that has led me to the extreme fringe of introversion.
And, my decision would baffle the majority of society. Let the labels and stereotypes fly rampantly. Doesn't bother me any. I have no plans of reinventing my identity in order to placate to the insecurities of the irrelevant.
Prove your worth and I will happily adapt to a mentality that promotes the greater good of the whole.
At face value, nobody has any comprehension of the nuances of all that conspires to create what makes INTJs the riddle they appear to be. Get to know one very closely and it all makes perfect sense. There is a method to the madness."