What Kids Really Think About Mom

 
- His last name...

- She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer? Did he say ’no’ to drugs and ’yes’ to chores?


Why did your mom marry your dad?

- My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom...eats a lot...

- My grandma says that Mom didn’t have her thinking cap on.


What makes a real woman?

- It means you have to be really bossy without looking bossy.


Who’s the boss at your house?

- Mom doesn’t want to be boss, but she has to because Dad’s such a goofball...

- I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than Dad.


What’s the difference between moms and dads?

- Moms work at work and work at home,and dads just got to work at work...

- Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them...

- Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power ’cause that’s who you gotta ask if you want to sleep over at your friend’s.


What does your mom do in her spare time?

- Mothers don’t do spare time...

- To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.


What’s the difference between moms and grandmas?

- About 30 years.


Describe the world’s greatest mom?

- She would make broccoli taste like ice cream!...

- The greatest mom in the world wouldn’t make me kiss my fat aunts!...

- She’d always be smiling and keep her opinions to herself.


Is anything about your mom perfect?

- Her teeth are perfect, but she bought them from the dentist...

- Her casserole recipes. But we hate them...

- Just her children.


What would it take to make your mom perfect?

- On the inside she’s already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery...

- Diet. You know, her hair. I’d dye-it, maybe blue.


If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?

- She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I’d get rid of that...

- I’d make my mom smarter. Then she would know, it was my...sister who did it and not me.