PERFECT DAY FOR A WOMAN
Wake up to hugs and kisses.
Weigh 5lbs. lighter than yesterday
Breakfast in bed, squeezed
orange juice and croissants
Soothing hot bath with
fragrant lilac bath oil
Light workout at club with
handsome, funny personal trainer.
Facial , manicure, shampoo, and comb out.
Lunch with best friend at an outdoor cafe.
Notice ex-boyfriend’s wife, she has gained 30 lbs.
Shopping with friends.
A dozen roses delivered by florist.
Card is from a secret admirer.
Light workout at club followed
by a gentle massage.
Pick outfit for dinner.
Primp before mirror.
Candlelight dinner for two followed by dancing.
Hot shower. Alone.
Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling
Fall asleep in his big, strong arms.A PERFECT DAY FOR A MAN
Massive dump while reading the sports section.
Filet Mignon, eggs, toast and tea.
Bloody Mary en route to airport
Private jet to Augusta Georgia.
Limo to Augusta National Golf Club.
Play front nine at Augusta,
finish 2 under par.
2 dozen oysters on the half shell.
Play back nine at Augusta,
finish 4 under par.
Limo back to airport.
Drink 2 Bombay martinis.
Private jet to Nassau,
Late afternoon fishing excursion
with topless female crew.
Catch world record light tackle marlin - 1249 lbs.
Jet back home.
En route, get massage from naked supermodel.
Lobster appetizers, 1963 Dom Perignon,20oz. New York strip.
Relax after dinner with 1789 Augler Cognac and Cohiba Cuban cigar.
Have sex with two 18 year old nymphomaniacs.
Massage and Jacuzzi.
Go to bed.
One last blowjob
Let loose a 12 second, 4 octave fart.
Watch the dog leave the room.
Laugh yourself to sleep.polish version